Update, February 8: Shattered dreams.

You can no longer bid to own one of history’s great beards, according to eBay: “This listing was ended by the seller because the item was lost or broken.”

Update, February 5: Chaos in the auction room.

What began as a totally run-of-the-mill, nothing-to-see-here auction of a bag of stale beard clippings has gone berserk, with bids currently at £19,000 ($29,000). And what if Weatherall grows his whiskers back? He may have found a sideline even more lucrative than remixing Noel Gallagher.

A top-tier beard can be yours.

Rumours have been circulating since the weekend that British dance institution Andrew Weatherall has undergone a quick but drastic makeover, and now we have proof: his beard clippings are for sale on eBay.

“Not only is this a chance to own the beard, but it is also expected to have a steady revenue stream from appearances worldwide,” the seller notes. Bids have so far topped £43.99, and the auction ends on February 10.

Weatherall’s beard had become almost as much of a fixture in the dance landscape as the remix king himself, so we’re sorry to see it go – but we’re equally excited to place our bid and fetch the sticky back plastic.

Below is what we believe to be a very recent snap of the beardless Weatherall, in conversation with ex-Fall member Brix Smith Start at a Faber event.

If you need an introduction, here are Weatherall’s 30 greatest remixes.

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